" Blue sky always bring pleasure, and shiny sun always bring rejoice "
It happened last Monday. I had a task to do questionnaires distribution to fellow selected patients. It was for my research, as a final year assignment. I and my other group members do research about heart disease in relation to anxiety and depression. I must say, this research is personally related to mine. My health.
I entered medical ward, looking at the Cencus ( patient's register information). There was a female patient with heart problem. She had problem with her heart's wall. It is progressively weakening. Due to that, all her extremities swollen up. I am sorry not to able explain it more, you may be a lil bit bored or confused then. ;)
After getting the consent from her, we started our interview session since her eyes can barely see. I am so sorry for her to face all those challenges. Allah knows the reasons and I hope she will be rewarded for her patience. She then started to spill out her feelings. Her sadness. Her disappointment. Her hard days. Most of the reasons were closely related to her ex husband. She was left alone, while her husband found a new partner. That's what commonly happens nowadays. If only men know how bad is the effect of leaving their wives in sadness, while they are totally forgotten them and all the sacrifices. It is really really bad. Their healths, their emotions, their motivations. All mess up.
I monologued while she spilled out what she kept insides, " I totally know what do you feel, really. I face it almost most of the times. It is still on my mom's face. I can see the sadness and all the mess up things. " The tears just gonna come out whenever it reminds me of those moments. The divorce's events. The separation. The cries. The hatred.
Oh my, I already was carried away with my own feelings. That patient, I called her Aunt. In the middle of her converses, she stopped and wiped her tears. Still, she told me now, she is able to gain strength again. She cannot be down for the whole time while her ex husband is always happy. Worthless. I am happy for her to say that. It is what I hope from her. Being continuously sad did affect her health. Her physical heart. She also hope that her life can end earlier that it should be. It was in the past. Now, she still wanna be alive and continue her days. Although, she may suffers her again.
At the end of the session, she pat on my thigh and advised me in a slow voice.
" If you are about to enter a marriage, don't set off your mind its only about your husband. You must take a good care of you parents too. Don't ever thoughts of 100% sacrifices for your only husband, because there is a risk he may not appreciate it one day. Be balance and keep assets for yourself too as a preparation if things are not going well in your marriage. You must be brilliant in keeping a good life. "
It is so true. Men should be trust of their loves, and their promises. But, we as women also have to mind the risks and be prepare for our own goods. We must not ever let any of those unhappiness affect our own lives and health. Yet, a poor marriage ending is inevitable, but we must take care of ourselves if that may happen. Na'udzubillahi min dzalik ya Allah..
Before we say goodbye, she gave me a warm hug. Such a motherly hug that I always pleasure.
Thanks very much for a very nice conversation that I had that day. My motivation somehow burnt out. I am happy to be somebody who listen to other people's matter.
InshaAllah, I will be a good doctor who can bring comfort to my patient's heart.